Baseball Baptism Fever

[Archaea]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

If I was assigned to be a missionary for 2 years in Highland Park, TX, I would just quit. Do something else.

Highland Park, per wikipedia, has a median income of 373,000.

The ward that occupies it is in my stake. It doesn't integrate with the rest of the stake.

It's a pretty bad attitude to dismiss the Africans because the German members are racists and xenophobes.

It was pragmatic.

Did this persons speak German? Would, and they were all men in my situation, he attend church despite the attitude of the local members?

If they didn't speak German and didn't live near an English speaking ward, wouldn't stop drinking and smoking what good did it do?

If somebody wanted to be taught, we taught that person as we were dying to find those, but there were no African barrios in Germany, simply immigrant barrios. And immigrants, mostly Turks, had no language skills and being Muslim, had less interest than Germans. You know not of which you speak.

I imagine I contacted more persons than you can imagine. In just one of my areas, we calculated I had 250,000 persons to talk to.

For the record, I taught, Ghanans, Nigerians, South Africans, Pakistanis, Iranians, Russians, Serbs, Croats, Chinese, French (two girls), Pols, Italians, Spaniards.

In one week, when we taught 0 discussions, I tracted 40 hours and street worked another 60 hours, it was our pinhead week. I believe we counted 300 persons we contacted without success.

On an average week we may have contacted 100 to 150 persons without success.

Was I particularly effective? Probably not but above average, if numbers mean anything, which they don't.

You cannot understand the numbers. We have roughly 150 missionaries and many companionships would go weeks without teaching a single discussion. And when we taught them, we taught only the first and almost never got a follow up meeting.

"Hey dude, we're all the way from America and like to take about something that makes us happy."

"Got a match?"

"Oh you're religious nuts, go f.. yourselves."

IT was surreal. Dali's paintings went through my mind constantly.

[PaloAltoCougar]

Originally Posted by SeattleUte

No. What he should have done is spent two years wandering through museums, the black forest, Bavarian Alps, beer halls, chateaus, and medievel castles and cathedrals, with a nubile fraulein as his guide. I'm sure in his heart he agrees with me.

During my two years in Austria, I remained hopeful that once, just once, we'd be tracting a tall apartment building, my companion would excuse himself to go down to the car or his bike, and I'd be left alone at the door. Either Elke Sommer or Senta Berger (you feckless youth can Google for some pleasant views), wearing only a diaphanous gown, would open the door and invite me in (fantasy fades to black here).

Unfortunately, this never happened. Instead, over those two years, I met the fat, elderly widow of every soldier who died on the Russian Front, as well as most every Yugoslav guest worker (for whom our approach consisted of shouting "WE ARE FROM THE CHURCH OF KRESIMIR COSIC!!!!"). Shouting offsets any language deficiencies.

My companions and I spent every P-Day at art museums or historical sites, and we founded the Austria Konditorei Association, an organization devoted to sampling the finest in Alpine pastries; members were required to sample at least five pastries a week and provide written reviews. We actually baptized a few Austrians based solely on testimonies of the Gospel without any athletics or financial incentives. Still, with no Elke or Senta sightings, I regard my mission has having had only mixed success.

[Archaea]

Originally Posted by PaloAltoCougar

During my two years in Austria, I remained hopeful that once, just once, we'd be tracting a tall apartment building, my companion would excuse himself to go down to the car or his bike, and I'd be left alone at the door. Either Elke Sommer or Senta Berger (you feckless youth can Google for some pleasant views), wearing only a diaphanous gown, would open the door and invite me in (fantasy fades to black here).

Unfortunately, this never happened. Instead, over those two years, I met the fat, elderly widow of every soldier who died on the Russian Front, as well as most every Yugoslav guest worker (for whom our approach consisted of shouting "WE ARE FROM THE CHURCH OF KRESIMIR COSIC!!!!"). Shouting offsets any language deficiencies.

My companions and I spent every P-Day at art museums or historical sites, and we founded the Austria Konditorei Association, an organization devoted to sampling the finest in Alpine pastries; members were required to sample at least five pastries a week and provide written reviews. We actually baptized a few Austrians based solely on testimonies of the Gospel without any athletics or financial incentives. Still, with no Elke or Senta sightings, I regard my mission has having had only mixed success.

We did meet two nubile young German singers in their apartment and taught waiting for other adults to arrive, got their autographs and wondered which discussion we should count that as. We counted it a the J, or Chastity discussion, because we were lucky to have kept ours. I still thought the younger, cuter one would follow me to America. She didn't.

[ute4ever]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

If I was assigned to be a missionary for 2 years in Highland Park, TX, I would just quit. Do something else.

I had a zone leader say that missionary work is partly finding the elect, and partly preparing others for their future judgment, so Christ could say with accuracy "you rejected my word on X day at X hour." It was his motivation to keep working while in difficult areas, so he would feel like he was still accomplishing something.

[Archaea]

Originally Posted by ute4ever

I had a zone leader say that missionary work is partly finding the elect, and partly preparing others for their future judgment, so Christ could say with accuracy "you rejected my word on X day at X hour." It was his motivation to keep working while in difficult areas, so he would feel like he was still accomplishing something.

I liked meeting people. I hated being told to f.. off, but generally I could find something to discuss. I think I would have just talked to people about stuff more, and not pushed religious discussion as much.

[ute4ever]

Originally Posted by PaloAltoCougar

During my two years in Austria, I remained hopeful that once, just once, we'd be tracting a tall apartment building, my companion would excuse himself to go down to the car or his bike, and I'd be left alone at the door. Either Elke Sommer or Senta Berger (you feckless youth can Google for some pleasant views), wearing only a diaphanous gown, would open the door and invite me in (fantasy fades to black here).

Hmm well while tracting in the student housing at Ole Miss, a slender twentysomething answered the door fresh out of the shower with nothing but a bathrobe, and when her little Yorkie ran out, she crouched down and called him back, which took about a minute of coaxing. Suffice it to say Elder Clarno and I completely forgot the rest of our pitch.

[RC Vikings]

Just reading these stories and thinking about my own it seems the darker the skin is of the people you were interacting with the greater were your chances for success. I served 11 months with cold, hockey playing whites and 13 months with fun, heavy drinking Indians. We had a lot more success on the reserves then we ever did in the city. My neighbor who is in Africa right now is baptizing about a family a week. Other then having Malaria five times things seem to be going well for him. With the churches past history it seems a little ironic.

[cougarobgon]

Originally Posted by MikeWaters

Well, where you guys screwed up is in not teaching the minorities.

That's where all the potential converts are. The displaced, the uprooted, the poor.

I am sure you realize that those you call "the minorities" are or are quickly becoming the majority in many cities in the US where the Church is sending missionaries. In some cities in Texas, California, Arizona, New Mexico, etc, my people (hispanic descent) are no longer the displaced, the uprooted, or the poor. Unfortunately, as whole, we still remain a minority in economic circles. Some have yet to figure a way out of poverty. However, progress has been made, and I see a bright future for my people in and out of the Church.

I credit all that I have experienced both spiritually and temporally to the influence the Church and its members have had in my life. I will always be greatful for that family the bishop assigned to give us a ride to Church every Sunday after we were baptized. It was out of their way and it took time and effort to haul five kids to Church and back. As we were taught the Gospel my family recognized the need to be self sufficient and within a few months I obtained my license, my mother scraped enough money to buy an old car and we have been self sufficient ever since.

[MikeWaters]

there are only two YM in my ward who are not part-latino. And only one of two is white.

No latinos and at least a quarter of my stake disappears.

[creekster]

Originally Posted by PaloAltoCougar

During my two years in Austria, I remained hopeful that once, just once, we'd be tracting a tall apartment building, my companion would excuse himself to go down to the car or his bike, and I'd be left alone at the door. Either Elke Sommer or Senta Berger (you feckless youth can Google for some pleasant views), wearing only a diaphanous gown, would open the door and invite me in (fantasy fades to black here).

In Quebec spring fever is a very real thing. As soon as it hits about 60 degrees following th elong winter people start shedding their clothes in alarming fashion. Sometimes the alarm was good (young women) sometimes not so good (old fat guys in speedos or less). Because the winters are so sever in Quebec, many people actually seal off their front doors in the winter so the only operable door is the entry to the House through the garage. SO to tract you actually need to walk into the garage and knock ont he door. In the spring we would frequently need to walk through the garage and into the back yard where people would be in various states of undress. Sadly, none of these were like Elke Sommers, but to a 20 year old some were surprisingly close.

I also tracted into a full on orgy once and the door was answered by a completely nude man and a completely nude woman who were both giggling. In the background were many people in assorted states of, um, activity. My companion just stared. I said we had a message but it would probably be better if we came back later. The woman giggled something about us coming anytime we wanted to. We thanked her and we left. We stopped tracting that night and just went home.