Here's an idea to reverse decline in LDS membership gains and activity

[SeattleUte]

The First Presidency issues a proclamation that all married couples should have sex five times a week, certainly no less than two. They can establish sex nights like FHE.

I figure the guys presently in a torpor about LDS faith or many who are now uninterested in joining would quickly and easily buy into the "follow the leaders" mantra, and the women, especially the ones who chant "honor your priesthood" (they being the women who probably like sex the least) would be in a box. The LDS Church's appeal is to people with an old fashioned paternalistic outlook anyway.

I have to give attribution. This idea came to me while reading a novel by a Frenchman, Michel Houlebeq, called The Possiblity of an Island. It's futuristic and there's a subplot about a cult that supercedes monotheism as the dominant belief system.