Bednar on taking offense--true or not?

[jay santos]

http://www.lds.org/conference/talk/d...646-32,00.html

When we believe or say we have been offended, we usually mean we feel insulted, mistreated, snubbed, or disrespected. And certainly clumsy, embarrassing, unprincipled, and mean-spirited things do occur in our interactions with other people that would allow us to take offense. However, it ultimately is impossible for another person to offend you or to offend me. Indeed, believing that another person offended us is fundamentally false. To be offended is a choice we make; it is not a condition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else.

Is this true or not? I say no. I don't think it's possible or even necessarily good for someone to not be offended when someone is saying something offensive. If Rocky calls me a piece of shit, of course I'm going to be offended. It's not really honest or intimate with other people to pretend like nothing verbal would ever hurt you. Just like getting punched in the face. I can't choose not to let it hurt. It's gonna be painful. On the offense, I can choose how to react after the initial feeling of being hurt. I can react harshly or hold a grudge or refuse to forgive. That's what we have a choice in.